After 44 hours Fourteen Words.

yeah I am fine I'll write in full latter its too hot right now :) xxx

Thats all we get but its enough, too hot its 9am and 97 degrees, does she think its going to cool down.

Plane goes down in Vietnam

Teenagers are not human beings. Late on Friday afternoon i ask my daughter if she had agreed to hook up at Heathrow with any of the other 17 or so people that she will be meeting up with in Vietnam. I ask for several reasons the travelling time from Heathrow to Hanoi is 19 1/2 hours which is a long time to spend alone, and the 3 hour stop over in kuala Lumpur also on her own would be a worry for us because although she's pretty sensible and has passed through airports on many occasions, she has never done it on her own and has relied on others mainly us to see everything went as it should. Also no parent would feel completely at ease with the thought of their attractive 18 yr old being alone in a foreign airport , especially the first time she's travelled alone. Well after a little thought she got on facebook and found that one other person was on the same flight and agreed to meet and checking together, she was relieved as were we. Well we got to the airport met up with the girl who looked 15 but was 19 and had travelled around Europe alone last summer so we were relieved that she would be with some one who had a bit of experience travelling. Anyway we got them checked in took them up to the the entrance of the departure lounge and we said our goodbyes.
We have a tradition in our family as do many others, which is when ever we go on a long journey when we arrive we get in touch, let your closest know you are safe etc. Anyway i always check departure times (some airlines also have realish time tracking info) and arrival times because i can and to reasure myself, so 25 minute delay taking off from Heathrow, fine, arrival kuala lumpur on time, departure to Hanoi 20 minute delay, fine, arrival time Hanoi passes 4 hours go by no call, text or email, i check Hanoi arrival info plane departed kuala lumpur as expected due in 13.10 local time what time is it in Hanoi 17.30! What does it say for flight MH752 from kuala Lumpur, no fucking info at this time. Me I'm chilled about stuff like that, but who just happens to walk into the room at that moment a now very worried mum who immediately thinks the worst. I say look if a 747 went down over Vietnam we would have heard. I've Skyped her mobile texted and emailed her. As i type this she's been on the ground in Hanoi for 20 hours. Fucking teenagers you can rely on them to be totally thoughtless. Her Mums still worried all i can think is typical teenager.

You Will Go to Vietnam

On Saturday my daughter is off to Vietnam for a month she hasn't been away from us for that long before, she spent a couple of weeks in Spain and New York but never a whole month. We've known for a couple of months, i've been nagging her to sort herself out on a daily basis and rolled of lists of stuff she needs to do and get done before she goes, Visa, boots, rucksack, Vacinations, anti-Malarials, break the boots in, shes going in to the jungle with brand new boots, had them for 3 weeks everyday i explain why she needs to wear them in others have advised her as well but its like talking to an obstinate idiot (fucking teenagers) every step that i've got out of her has been like pulling a tooth, its almost like she's doing us a favor, and i've done just about everthing all the bookings the apointments, reasearch the lot if i hadnt ii wouldnt have happened, I doubt she would actually be going (and when i say doubt she would be going i mean the money would be spent but she wouldnt be ready to get on the plane) and if she did she would have been totally unprepaired. FFS we didnt even want her to go, its costing about £3000 for a month, £3000 that was to be used as living expenses while she was at Uni. She will miss that £3000 in the coming years probly while shes in here 3rd year at Uni because i'm determined that we won't pay twice. Sound mean? nah she has to learn and it will be about time that she learns that life is hard, the bank of Mum and Dad is going to close. Its totally exasperating and our daughter is one of the bright ones and on the whole incredibly sensible. I hope she enjoys herself i just wonder when will the penny drop about how much it is actualy costing her. With our luck she'll no doubt go to a Uni in London so we'll be stuck with her for another four years....................

Bring it on.

This it not the first blog I have had, the first was several years ago, I posted one article with the intention of writing more but of course I never did. I found that I would spend hours thinking about what to write but never actually doing any writing. I had many things that I wanted to say, but what should I write first. My initial thoughts were to give a brief autobiography of who and what I am but thought better of it because in doing so I could actually in ways that I won’t go in to at this time harm the two people that are closest to me. I am also painfully aware that my ability to write in a coherent way was/is limited be by my dyslexia. The thought of having to write a letter or note in the place know as the real world brings me out in a sweet. I was also aware that the people most likely to read my blog would seize any opportunity to rip me a second or third arsehole and honestly I couldn’t blame them. As I type this I am thinking why am I doing this, some say their blog is simply an outlet for themselves and it for no one else which is of course in most cases utter rubbish because if it was just for them they would keep a personal diary, readers are important, will I have any, do I want to open myself up to ridicule, ridicule is something that I am used to on Usenet I set myself up for it and thrive on it I basically don’t give a shit there, being a cunt is easy, although lately its been harder as I find arguing both tiring and tedious. Being nice is so much harder because you have to force it at times when you really aren’t in the mood because people expect something from you when you are nice.

Revelations of a dead man walking

Thats what i feel like at times.